Tag Archive for 'Humor'
One of my favorite films is ‘The Shadow’ starring Alex Baldwin. It’s a campy, rather dumb film, but the visuals are quite good, and so is the dialogue. Just to be clear, Alec Baldwin is Lamont Cranston who is ‘The Shadow’, the titular vaguely evil superhero:
Margo Lane: “Oh, God I dreamed.”
Lamont Cranston: “So did I. What did you dream?”
Margo Lane: “I was lying naked on a beach in the South Seas. The tide was coming up to my toes. The sun was beating down. My skin hot and cool at the same time. It was wonderful. What was yours?”
Lamont Cranston: “I dreamed I tore all the skin off my face and was somebody else underneath.”
Margo Lane: “You have problems.”
Lamont Cranston: “I’m aware of that.”
I never get tired of that exchange. Baldwin delivers it in such a deadpan manner that it kills me every time. … I’m just sayin’.
In keeping with my promise to treat St. Barack of Assisi with all the dignity and respect that the American Left treated President Bush, enjoy this image of our new president smashing his head against the edge of Marine One. In my mind I can hear that delicious ‘BONK!’ - like a great big coconut.
I hereby declare Marine One to be my new favorite helicopter.
(Blue Thunder walks away, sniffling.)
If you’re anything like me your thinking can this Barack action figure withstand the explosive power of an M80 firecracker? Hell GI Joe took his fare share of fire cracker tests when I was a kid, even Megatron launched a few whistler rockets! This Barack action figure has posable fingers and adjustable facial expressions! Stop motions artist are gonna have a field day with this!!!
At first this made me laugh.
Then it made me feel badly for any man who would find one necessary.
And then it was funny again! This product was even worse.
Hold her and have a good sleep…. The Girlfriend’s Arm Pillow, shaped like a woman’s torso with right arm and breasts, is designed for the single boy in need of some comfort while he sleeps.
Just another peek into the kind of television programming Hamas creates for children.
No, this is not a joke.
DesignLive has a great collection of Photoshop tutorials for making people into zombies, creating spooky-looking text effects and what not. I’m going to give them a try tonight. 
The ‘evil eye’ tutorial looks promising!
My starting image will be this:
Instead of a little girl in the car with him, a screaming Uncle Sam. Maybe I’ll put ‘Socialism’ on the front of the car, and a highway scene behind the bumper car.
Russian strongman Vladimir Putin’s mid-life crisis continues apace.
Putin recently divorced his wife in order to marry a 25-year-old rhythmic gymnast, and he’s been spending a lot of time in the wilderness tracking and shooting wild tigers, and fishing bare-chested. He’s man dammit, a great big burly Russian man, and the world needs to know it.
Also, he invaded a much smaller nation. And you all just avoided seeing a picture of Putin fishing sans shirt.
But here’s the video of Putin showing off his Great White Ninja maneuvers!
I’m hoping to see the “Learn Metal-Detecting With President Carter” video.
But wait, it gets even more funny! From the article above:
Putin is a one-time judo champion of his home city St. Petersburg, called Leningrad at the time, and he doesn’t hesitate to promote the sport.
For instance, the former Russian president has disclosed that French President Nicolas Sarkozy wants to take some martial arts lessons.
“He is interested in martial arts, and we have decided to do some training together,” Le Figaro, a leading French newspaper, quoted Putin as saying in an interview published last month.
“Let’s Learn How to Get Thrown to the Ground with President Sarkozy!”
Which reminds me — I haven’t mocked the French in some way in several minutes… has it occurred to anyone that Sarkozy looks a lot like that one guy from ‘The Kids in the Hall’?
Fresh Cracks...